My Super Ex-Boyfriend! All The Episodes.

All the Episodes of My Super Ex-Boyfriend in one post. Enjoy!




My Super Ex-Boyfriend! Episode Four

My Super Ex-Boyfriend Episode Five

My Super Ex-Boyfriend Episode Six

My Super Ex-Boyfriend! Episode Seven

My Super Ex-Boyfriend! Episode Eight

My Super Ex-Boyfriend! Episode Nine

My Super Ex-Boyfriend! Episode Ten

My Super Ex-Boyfriend! Episode Eleven


Finding Happiness Episode Eleven

Oh God. Thank God. Tears of joy rolled down my cheeks. Nifemi was awake.
“My love. How are you?” I said through dry cotton mouth.
“I’ve been better. How are you? Daddy says you’ve been worried sick and if I didn’t speak with you, you won’t sleep a wink.” He sounded so weak, but no doubt my Nifemi.
“I’m fine. Better now I’ve heard your voice.”
“Are you crying?”
“No.” I wiped my tears.
“You should know I wouldn’t let a little thing like a bullet keep us apart. We are going to grow old together.”
I was nodding my head as though he could see me.
“Now we’ve spoken, we’re going to go to sleep. We’ve had a long, rough day.”
“Okay my love.”
“Goodnight babe.”
“Goodnight my love. Love you sooo much.”
“Same here.”
We ended the call. I cradled the phone to my chest and blessed God for saving Nifemi.

“We should get married.” Nifemi said as we relaxed in the living room at his apartment, watching TV.

It was a week later and we had just returned from the hospital. He had been transferred to his company’s hospital in Lagos two days after he regained consciousness at his request (or order). And in less than a week he made the doctor discharge him, declaring that if he wasn’t discharged, he would discharge himself.

It was a tremendous relief to me when he was transferred to Lagos, for I could be near him.

“We are getting married, as soon as we set a date.” I smiled at him and snuggled in, as close as I could be on the couch we were seated on.

“No, that would take like months. Lets have a civil service immediately, this week. I want you to move in with me, as my wife.”

I stared, wide eyed in mild surprise. “But the plans are already in motion, what about all the other plans….” The plans were for us to have the traditional engagement, court wedding, church marriage and reception in a week.

“Like….” He asked.

“The church wedding?”

“It will still go on as planned, when we fix it.” We hadn’t fixed a date with our pastor.
“You said we need a bigger apartment.” I reminded him.

“We do. You’ll search from here.”

“I don’t have anything to wear, and besides I heard court weddings take time to……”

“You have a few days to find something to wear, nothing fancy, the big wedding is still up ahead. This is just going to be us and family. As for court weddings taking time to arrange, I’m a lawyer remember? Any other questions or objections?”

“None at all.”

He squeezed my shoulders fondly and kissed me on the forehead.

My mind immediately went into overdrive. What to wear? I have to inform Dupe, aunt Mabel, his parents, because knowing Nifemi he’ll probably wake up tomorrow to say our wedding was that day.

“What’s the hurry?” I asked him.

“Why put off till tomorrow what you can do today.” He replied immediately.

“Were you expecting that question?”

He laughed. “I know you, I can practically see the wheels turning in your head.”

I eyed him without heat. That was the thing about Nifemi and I, we knew each other so well we could almost accurately tell what the other was thinking. But this rushed wedding he was springing on me…….

In a way though, it was still typical Nifemi. He loved to surprise me.

Later, I called MaryAnn of MAP designs and asked her if she could make me a dress in twenty-four hours, that was all the time I was confident I had. I notified our family. And true to his words, two days later, Nifemi and I were married at a simple registry wedding. The service was so beautiful; we exchanged our vows surrounded by friends and family. The simplicity of the event suited me, I was tempted to cancel the fanfare of a wedding aunt Mabel and his mom were planning, but I knew they’ll probably have a fit if I did.

MaryAnn came through for me, my dress was breathtaking, it was a blush-pink lace mermaid gown, and it fitted me like a glove. Nifemi looked dapper in a blue suit, and I can’t get over the joy of being Mrs Olatunji. Dupe was my maid of honor off course, and Ehis, MaryAnn’s husband was Nifemi’s best man. We had a lunch party at a dainty restaurant, after which Nifemi and I, no, my husband and I proceeded on our honeymoon. Nifemi surprised me with a trip to Seychelles Island.

We had the church marriage blessing two months later, with the gbogbo ero reception; despite that I was seriously showing by then, MaryAnn still worked wonders with my dress, this one was cream colored.

A few months later, I had my children; yes I had twins, a girl and a boy. I really blessed God. I remembered how my year began, how God had given me my heart desire. I had found happiness!


Its been an eventful eleven weeks with Keji’s story on her journey to Finding Happiness, her story is by no means finished because a true love story never ends, but we’ll stop here; where she married her prince. I also concluded MaryAnn and Ehis’ story from My Super Ex-Boyfriend series.

In a couple of weeks, I’ll publish a short story, I hope y’all look forward to it. After that, another series will begin.

Meanwhile as always, Beauty and Fashion editorials continue as well as Ms Psyche. Stick around.
I love to hear from you, please leave your thoughts as comments.

Read, enjoy, comment, share and subscribe to my blog for email updates.

Thank you! Once again; Happy New Month, Welcome to April!



Finding Hapiness Episode Five

“I’ve been giving it a lot of thought, you and me. I really don’t know what to say or how to say it, do you think we could try out the relationship thing?”

Despite that I was expecting something along those lines, I was shocked nonetheless.
Nifemi was usually very eloquent and adept at expressing his feelings, the Nifemi before me was different, a tad insecure. My heart melted.

“I think that’s a good idea. The relationship thingy I mean.” I replied encouragingly with a cheeky smile, trying to diffuse the tension.

He laughed in relief. “You just had to make me ask didn’t you?” He asked as he took me in his arms.

“I needed to be sure.”

He closed in on me. “I’ve just recently noticed how kiss able your lips are.”

Funny enough, me also. “Recently?” I asked in feigned coy.

“Yea, I really don’t know when, but I’ve started seeing you differently.” He tucked some stray strands of hair behind my ear.

“Was I ugly before?” I teased.

“No. I guess I just didn’t notice.”
I leaned in and kissed him. Fireworks!
A light bulb went off in my head, I eased away.

“What of Zara?” I asked him. “I haven’t seen or heard of her in a while, and you’re asking me….”

He sighed. “We ended.”

I had this feeling there was more to this story, and I wanted to know.
“Why, when?”

“A while back. It just ended.” He replied evasively.


He steered me homewards. “Not now. We’ll talk about it some other time.”

That was good enough for me. If Nifemi promised, he fulfilled, and I was happy that Zara girl was out of Nifemi’s life. Not just because of us, I just had this bad feeling about her.

And so we began, a new phase of our life-long relationship. To our surprise everyone greeted our relationship with an; ‘it’s about time!’ Like really? Were we the last to see the signs?

There were awkward moments between us though, we now saw each other in a new light and the transition wasn’t easy. Nevertheless, I was truly happy. Nifemi was an answer to my prayers.

The speed with which I sold out the clothes I got from Dubai amazed even me. I even had orders for the next time I would go. The only snag was a lot of the goods weren’t paid for immediately, but I made plans to travel again soon.

Nifemi and Dupe encouraged me to face this as a career, and I desperately needed to succeed.

Two months later, Nifemi and I were invited to his friends engagement party. His friend and old school mate Ehis was getting married in a month to the Love of his life; MaryAnne Phillips, a celebrity designer. MaryAnne’s friends were hosting the engagement party for the couple.

I had met MaryAnne once in the company of Nifemi, Ehis and the guys and she seemed nice, while Ehis was a regular face. He and Nifemi had been friends since forever.

I wore a short sleeveless purple gown paired with strappy pink sandals, the dress code was smart casual, and knowing I was going to be in the midst of fashionistas I wanted to make sure I represented without appearing to over try.

The party was held at an up scale restaurant in VI, and was already in full swing when Nifemi and I arrived.

“Look who’s here; the latest lovebirds.” MaryAnne announced with a smile when she sighted us.

We laughed. She was standing with two beautiful ladies, one of them visibly pregnant.

“You and Ehis are the latest lovebirds.” I replied as we hugged and air kissed.

“No honey, we’re practically oldies. Have you met my friends? Nifemi and Keji, meet Clara and Susan and co.” MaryAnne introduced us, indicating the pregnant lady as Susan and co.

We all laughed.

“Hello ladies.” Nifemi shook both their hands. “…And co.” He waved at Susan’s stomach.

Through our laughter, I couldn’t help noticing how adorable Nifemi was. I smiled my secret smile.

“Why have you ladies monopolised Nifemi?” Ehis asked as he walked up behind us. He hugged MaryAnne from behind and she leaned into him.

“Hello Ehis. Congratulations to you both.” I said to he and MaryAnne.

“Thank you!” They chorused

“You aren’t married yet and you are sounding alike already?” Clara teased.

“We’ll leave you ladies. Later darling.” Ehis and Nifemi walked away to go join other guys and I marvelled at the change in Ehis. He used to be geeky, more comfortable with machines than humans. Was that him? This suave man I just saw? There’s nothing like the love of a beautiful woman.

Clara left to check on the caterers.

“So Keji, I heard you’ve gone into clothes retail?” MaryAnne asked me.

“Yes. Putting my MBA to use building my business.” I replied. I accepted a glass of wine from a circulating waiter.

“That’s good. That’s better than just working for someone else.” Susan said.

“Do you want to get a boutique or mobile? MaryAnne asked.

“Hopefully a boutique soon.” I replied.

“Ever think of selling Nigerian designs?” She asked.

“As in our ethnic fabrics?”

“Not necessarily. Ready to wear designs, like what we have on.” MaryAnne indicated our gowns, she had on a georgeous pink gown I was sure was one of her designs.

“Yea I do, but the cost of production makes the prices of made in Nigeria clothes high.”

“True.” She replied. “I’m not supposed to talk business tonight, but come by the showroom soon, and we’ll show you some of our works.”

“Ok.” We exchanged contacts.

“I need to sit for a bit.” Susan announced.

“Are you ok?” I asked as we walked with her to a chair in the corner.

“Yes I am.” She smiled brightly.

“She’s having twins.” MaryAnne explained as Susan sat.

“Wow! Congratulations!” I gave her a side hug.

“Thanx dear. She returned the hug.

“I need to circulate. See you girls in a bit.” MaryAnne left to talk to some other guests and Susan and I got to know each other better. She pointed out her husband to me, and told me about her career as a criminal lawyer.

After dinner and a toast to the couple, the party wound down. Nifemi and I were among the last to leave.

As he drove into my street, I got an sms; So you guys have graduated to PDA’s? I am watching!

Special dedication to my Mom, whose birthday was on Monday the 17th of February. May your days be long, and happy and may you enjoy the bountiful harvest ahead, Amen. Love you plenty.
Chinma Eke.

My Super Ex-Boyfriend! Episode Eleven

I didn’t tell Clara and Susan about my plans for Zach, not because I didn’t trust them, but because I wanted to tell them a finished story, and I had a suspicion all wasn’t going to go exactly as planned.

I passed through the hospital for my tests results on my way to Zach’s. Thankfully, the only test that returned positive was a mild infection. I thanked God. God knows this good result helped Zach, because if I got anything from him, I would have hurt him.

True to my suspicions, all didn’t go as planned. Adeola and I had planned for her to meet me at his estate gate, we would drive in my car. We had a feeling his gatekeeper might keep one of us away if we arrived separately.

To my surprise, she met me with Linda Adeshina in tow. Buoyed by the surprise I confronted her immediately.
“You knew we were both dating him and you said nothing, why?”

“It wasn’t my tale to tell, would you have believed me?” She countered straight up.

“Your silence encouraged him, he knew you knew and said or did nothing. What possible outcome did u expect?” I asked hotly.

She shrugged. I hissed and waved them into my car. When I honked at his gate, his gate man opened the gate immediately, and I got this hilarious thought: maybe Zach just instructed his gate men to always allow black Crosstour’s access, and never to let in more than one at a time. I chuckled and noticed the ladies giving me curious glances. I didn’t care, I wasn’t going to share.

When I parked the car and we alighted, I noticed the gate man stare open-mouthed at us three with his hands on his head in alarm. This got me cracking.

So I led my entourage of co-girlfriends into our boyfriend’s abode. I could hear him singing accompanied by his guitar, he was singing one of his recent hit love songs. Apparently he had been hoping to serenade me and get lucky.

Like in all those movies, his eyes were closed as he sang. We stood listening and at the end as though it were planned, we clapped.

His eyes flew open, he speedily set his guitar aside and got up simultaneously. His emotions were open to me like a book; from confusion, to fear, then he closed and hardened his gaze, and in that moment I knew it was truly over.

“Aren’t you going to invite us to sit?” I asked with false sweetness.

“So you guys know, what are you doing here then?” He asked as he calmly returned to his seat.

I was like, was this guy for real?
No remorse, no apology?

Adeola who had been sniffling beside me burst into tears.

I eyed her in anger. Couldn’t she have held herself together and not cry in his presence. I turned and headed out of the house.

“Anyone want a ride?” I asked from the front door.
No response. I guessed that was a no. I turned and saw them sizing themselves up. Perhaps hoping to be the ‘last girl standing.’
‘Ha! Time to go, before the cat fight began’. I thought to myself.

As I drove out of Zach’s compound for the last time, it was with mixed emotions. I had given Zach my heart and he dashed it. At the same time, I knew I couldn’t continue with him knowing about his betrayal. As I looked around my car, I lovingly patted the dashboard. It is true what they say; its better to cry in a bmw(in my case, a crosstour) than on a bicycle/cab/danfo.
And I did shed a few tears.


My girls were waiting eagerly for gist, I broke the good news; I was ‘almost’ disease free, and was Zach free.

The former they cheered at, the latter they didn’t know how to react until I put them at ease and ordered celebrations.

We popped wine, celebrated and partied till the security men came to inform us they were shutting down the building for the night.

We piled out to the car, then the quandary of who to drive. All three of us were tipsy.

“Let’s get a cab.” Susan suggested.

“What if Zach comes to steal the car overnight?” Susan asked.

Alcohol magnifies every sensation and idea. No way I was leaving my car in a parking lot overnight.

We mulled on this and decided we needed a driver. Who?

I got out my phone. “Hello.” I slurred out when Ehis answered.

“Hey MaryAnne, how you doing?” He said. I heard the sound of traffic in the background.

“We need a driver!” I screamed excitedly. His office was on the same street as mine, I hoped he hadn’t left.

He chuckled. “Where are the three musketeers now?” He asked amused.


“Office parking lot.” Susan amended.

“Okay, be there soon.” He ended the call.

We sat in the car while we waited, me in front, them behind. Ten minutes later, a sexy green sports car drove into the compound, and he alighted while another guy took his place in the driver’s seat and drove away.

“Is that his car?” Clara asked as we stared open mouthed at the receding beauty.

“I don’t know.” I replied.

“How can you not know, isn’t he your friend?” Susan questioned.

“Badass car!” Clara whispered in awe.

“Yea, is his car a requisite for friendship?” I countered.

He got to my car and I leaned over to open the driver’s door for him.

“Hello ladies.” He smiled at us.

“Hello.” We chorused.

“So what are we celebrating, it appears you ladies are quite…..?”

“We are not drunk.” I replied defensively.

“Just slightly tipsy.” Clara said.

“You know we’re law abiding citizens, we don’t drink and drive.” Susan added.

“Right. Law abiding citizens, not drunk, just slightly tipsy” He repeated, fighting laughter, emphasizing slightly.
“So, where are we headed?”

“Home.” We chorused.

“Okay, and that is where?”

“Surulere.” I replied.

“Ok.” He adjusted the car seat to his comfort, strapped in and started the engine. Checked that I was wearing my seatbelt and drove out.

One would think the drive was a test of sort, Clara and Susan asked so many questions of him, it helped me see Ehis in a new light.

With them, he sounded more confident. He talked lovingly of his car; ‘Pretty’ he named ‘her’. Talked about his work, family, etc.
We didn’t notice traffic and/or the passing of time and were surprised when we arrived at home. So soon?
He parked the car and got a cab home.
The friendship between Ehis and I did blossom into something more, but that’s another story.


The next day, the world woke to Zedeye’s twitter rants on how evil women are. I was so tempted to suggest to him he try doing men, but decided against it and un followed him.
Apparently, the rants continued, it even made the gossip blogs. Who cares? Not me!

Adeola kept obsessing over him, I got disgusted and snapped that she go back to him if she wants him that bad. I don’t know if she did, but it’s been years and he’s still single. Me, I focused on my business. As soon as I could, I traded in the ‘girlfriend special’ car for a newer model.

I remembered Zach because he came to see me. Yes, he came to MAP Designs to see me, reminisce and tell me how much he misses me. According to him; ‘I was the only one who let him be Zach, shedding the Zedeye weight.’
Sorry man, too late. I flashed him my wedding ring. I’m taken.

C’est fini!

* * * * * * *
It’s a week to Christmas, who is as excited as I am?
Yesterday was @gifty’s birthday, and we celebrate with her. I checked, she had a blast.
Let us know of your special moments and we will celebrate with you. Graycie’s birthday is up on the 22nd and we can’t wait, followed by Chinwe’s the day after. Goodness! Little wonder I fill out over christmas.

Next story coming up soon!

Chinma Eke.

My Super Ex-Boyfriend! Episode Ten

I got out my phone, and went straight to my twitter notifications, there was Adeola’s mention: I love social media, it gave me my Zach, and a cool new friend in @creativemaryanne!

We were like, was this lady for real? This was definitely deliberate, no way could she say in all honesty she didn’t know what she was doing.

This got me angry. How dare Zach and this woman come into my life with this trashy drama?

“MaryAnne, Mary!” Clara’s voice broke through my thoughts.

“Sorry, I was… What were you saying?” I asked her, returning to my seat beside them.

“Nothing, just bringing you back to the present. The emotions showing on your face ehn!

I grimaced. “Okay, enough of the pity party, what do I do?”

“I suggest you retweet and copy Zach.” Clara said.

“If you do that, they’ll know you are on to them.” Susan objected. “Retweet, don’t cc him. I think we should get more info before we confront them.”

“True, how?”


After much brainstorming that lasted the entire drive home, we concluded they wasn’t really much we could do, besides confronting them(Zach and Adeola).
I particularly wanted the whole debacle over and done with as soon as possible.

I called her the next day to invite her to lunch, she readily accepted and was on time too. We met up at a cafe close to my shop. Obviously neither of us was there for the food, we barely touched the salad we ordered.

After the meal, and fashion chit chat, I went straight to the point. “So, tell me more about Zach.” I asked her head on.

“Oh he’s the best.” She gushed. “We’ve been dating for over a year now, and it’s been wonderful.”

Over a year? Zach and I had been dating for about a year.

“How did you guys meet?” I asked her, a plastic smile on my face.

“Why do you ask?” She frowned.

“Nothing much, just curious. I’ve never met a celeb girlfriend.” I assuaged her. More like never met a co-girlfriend.

She began smiling again. “Zach is a private person. We met on social media, twitter exactly, and it spiralled from there.”

“Are you serious?” I asked wide eyed. Obviously, that was standard MO for him.

“Yea, twitter, I used to be so wary of those online hook ups till I met Zach. With him, it felt so right.” She got animated as she spoke.

“Really? Wow!”

“Double wow!” She had this theatrical voice on. “I got him to sign on with the PR firm I work for. Next year I’m starting my firm representing he and his label mates.”

I felt like dying, but kept up the act, who knew I had it in me to act. “Good for you.” I cheered her.

“Thanx love. I’m hoping next year we’ll also tie the nuptial knots.”

“Congratulations in advance!”

“Thank you!” She leaned towards me and gave me a side hug. “And, I would love for you to make my wedding gown.”

I laughed without mirth. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Are we done here, you want something else?” I asked.

“Yea, sure.” She replied.

I signalled a waiter for the bill. As we were about leaving, I thought; what the hell, do I want to stretch this out? So I asked her. “What’s the game plan? I know you know about Zach and I.”

She deflated instantly, and sighed. “Yes I know, Linda told me.”

“Linda…. Who?” I racked my brain for a Linda without success.

“Linda Adeshina”

“His music director?”

She nodded in confirmation.

“What does she have to…..” I got a cold and clammy feeling. Oh my! I refused to even process that thought. I remembered Linda’s behavior to me everytime we met, and bit by bit it all added up. “She is one of us?”

Adeola nodded in confirmation, my blood chilled. Looking at her I thought; if I looked as distraught as she did, we would make a frightful pair. I exhaled and glanced around the almost empty restaurant. The few scattered patrons were into their meal, none paying attention to us. Thank God. I signalled a waiter.
“Can I get a coke, regular normal sugar full coke.” I requested, I really needed the sugar high.

“Okay ma, anything for you?” He asked Adeola.

“Nothing, I still have water.” She indicated her half full glass of water.

We sat in silence each lost in our thoughts, until the waiter returned with my coke.

“I love Zach so much, he really is my soul mate, ever since I met him…” She began near tears.

“Calm down Adeola, if you cry I’m out of here.” I said to her sternly.

“I’m sorry, its just Zach and I…”

“Are soul mates, yes I got that.” I cut her off. Time for me to ask the questions I needed. “You say you met when?”

“Our two years anniversary is in two months.”

“He bought your car?”

“Yes, and he bought yours too.”

“Were you the lady in the pictures that went viral?”



“I don’t know. She won’t confirm or refute it, but it doesn’t look like her.”

“Jeez! Could there be another? How long have you known about he and Linda? And I? He Linda and I. This is so bizarre.”
The more I asked and she answered, it felt like I was speaking to myself, like we were comparing notes. I couldn’t believe I was in this situation. We had practically the same experiences, he said the same things to us, did the same thing, down to unprotected sex. I felt so sick, I prayed like I never prayed before that all the tests I took that morning returned negative.

When we left the restaurant hours later, I knew in my heart Zach and I were done.

I drove home, leaving Susan and Clara to find their way. I wasn’t in the mood for chit chat or pseudo psycho-analysis, I sent them a message, switched off my phone, and went straight to bed on getting home.


Two days later, I switched on my phone; lots of messages. From Clara and Susan, one from Zach, and many from Ehis. Sweet, kindoff clueless Ehis.
I made a mental note to respond to all my messages later, and I got ready for work.

There was an extra spring in my step, I stopped at a cafe to get doughnuts for everyone.

“You are, unexpectedly happy.”Clara remarked. “For someone who just had a twenty-four hour drop off the radar.”

“Its uncanny.” Susan confirmed.

“Don’t you girls have work to do?” I asked in mock seriousness. They both followed me into my office immediately I arrived.
“Why did you ditch CDS today?” I asked Susan.

“I’m tired joor, I need to rest.” She replied, helping herself to some doughnuts.

“Your wedding is about a month away, try to still fit into the dress MaryAnne is making for you.” Clara joked. Clara was a fitness junkie, and avoided fat like a plague.

“Okay. So?” Susan asked me. Obviously they were itching for news.

“I’m seeing Zach today.”

“And?” Clara asked impatiently.

“Patience my dears, all in good time.” I replied mysteriously. “Have some more doughnuts.” I offered them.

“Are you confronting him today?” Susan asked.

“Are you breaking up with him?” Clara asked at the same time.

“Dunno.” I replied evasively. “Most likely not.”

It’s two weeks to Christmas, and this year has been sooooo good! Congratulations to Niyi Muyi(an ardent Chinma Eke’s blog follower) and wife on the birth of their beautiful baby girl, may she grow to positively surpass all your expectations and to be a Chinma Eke’s blog follower as well. All the best!

PS: Share your blessings with us and I’ll give you a shoutout on air.”


Chinma Eke

My Super Ex-Boyfriend! Episode Nine

After work that day, Susan came over as usual to join us home, and Clara gisted her in detail. They laughed so hard at the car detail, I couldn’t help but manage a smile.

We were seated in our favourite lounge sofa, all our staff gone for the day.

“Zach is your own live Christian Grey. Can u believe it, there’s a ‘girlfriend special’ car!” Susan remarked through laughter.

“Seriously, we don’t know for certain he bought her the car.” I said.

“I’m willing to bet my wedding ring he bought that car.” Susan replied.

“And she has MaryAnne’s stature and colouring also. He also has a type.” Clara added.

They laughed harder.

“Oh my God! I’ve been such a fool!” I cried.

“I think you should speak with Zach before you draw that conclusion.” Clara sobered up. “I personally think it odd that she came over, insisted on meeting you, talked so much….. That spells ‘ex’ to me.

“Clara does have a point. This whole visit seems calculated to me, like she came to introduce herself, check you out, that kain thing.” Susan added.

“You girls are just trying to cheer me up.” I muttered, I was so confused. This whole thing seemed like a dream to me, but I was very aware of the reality of it.

Oya be sad. This relationship is so drama filled, we could write a soap outta it.” Susan jibed.

“Fifty shades of Zach!” Clara added, and they laughed.

“Okay, enough fun at my expense. We need to get going.” I got up, clutching my bag and car keys.

“Mary Anne is in her suppressing mood element.” Susan said to Clara in a stage whisper as they both got up.

“Her strong woman mood.” Clara agreed, talking about me as though I wasn’t there.

I left them to lock up and walked my car, feeling all levels of down.

“Please give me the keys, I have no desire to go swimming in the Lagos lagoon.” Susan said when they met up with me at the car.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked defensively.

“Mary, it’s obvious you are upset, why not let me drive.”

I got overwhelmed and burst into tears.

Clara unlocked the car, and they ushered me into the back seat. Thank God the parking lot was deserted, I would have hated to cause a scene.

I alternated between quiet racking sobs, and wailing and questioning fate. Why couldn’t I have a normal loving relationship. With a normal regular guy?
I didn’t ask for all these complications, the suspicion, numerous girls. This wasn’t me, I can’t go on this way.

Long minutes later, I stopped crying, and Susan drove homewards. I must have dozed off, I heard Clara call my name in my subconscious, I jerked awake.

“MaryAnne!” She called again.

“I’m, I’m awake.”

“Your phone is ringing.” I heard it, Zach’s ring tone.

“Answer it. Don’t say anything. I have a plan.” Susan urged.

I answered the call and said nothing about meeting his girlfriend. When he commented about my flat tone, I told him I was tired. So tired Susan was driving. He said all the right things, and we made tentative plans to see the next day.


The next day dawned bright and early, I got a twitter notification: ‘Lady Adeola’ followed me. I followed back. Then she sent me a facebook friend request, haba? This was beginning to look like witch hunting. I drew Clara’s attention to it and she made a joke and posted it on her PM; When your boyfriend’s girlfriend friends you on fb and follows you on twitter, you know there’s war in the land. Truly, this looked like a siege. I went through her profile, according to her she worked as a PR consultant for Zach PR rep. Either way, I was going to ask Zach about her.


Steeling my emotions, I drove to Zach’s. One look at me and he asked what was wrong.

“Nothing much, just tired.” I replied flippantly, summoning false cheer. “How are you, you also look beat.” I enquired as he led me into the house.

He exhaled and spread his hands expensively.

I laughed as we sat. “We are prototypes for the normal Lagosians. Tired but still hustling.”

“Yea. I have an idea, why don’t I order massages for us both?”


“Off course now. They can be here within the hour.” He picked up his phone from the side table, dialled and placed the order.
“They are on their way.” He said after the call.”

“Okay.” I liked the idea of the massage, at least it would remove the pressure of having to pretend all was fine. “I hope you ordered a male massuese for me?” I teased.

“Hell no! Female.”

“Male for you?”

“The spa usually sends female.” He replied flipping through TV channels.

“Ok.” I almost blurted out the question/accusation about Adeola, but decided to wait. I would ask after the massage. “I need a drink, you want some thing?” I asked instead, getting up.

“Mix me a cocktail.” He replied, intent on the football match re-run showing on Supersports.

“Aite.” I replied rolling my eyes at him. Behind him off course, inside me I said: yes your majesty.

I took my time making the drink, and a light snack too. All to kill time. By the time we finished the snack, the massuese had arrived. I gladly submitted myself to their expertise. An hour later, when they were done, we were both so relaxed. I felt like you could pour me in a bowl, so relaxed I dozed off for a while.

He woke me with kisses ot tell me it was getting late.

“You look so beautiful when you sleep, seeing you wake up, lights up my world.” He murmured. Planting more kisses.

Yikes! How did I end up in his bed? He must have moved me from the guest room. If I didn’t stop him, I knew what would happen in the next few minutes.

I yawned and stretched. “It’s late already?” I glanced out the windows through the drapes at the darkening skies.
“Gosh I need to get going.” I sat up.

“No time for your poor, lonely boyfriend?” He sighed, putting up a ‘poor me’ face.

“You know how it is, and besides it’s not a good time of the month.” I lied, anything to get out of there. I couldn’t bring myself to have sex with him knowing and suspecting what I did.

“Okay.” He sat up. “Then you need to get dressed and outta here soon.”

I didn’t need to be told twice, I got moving. Halfway through my dressing, I heard a: “Damn!” From Zach. I turned around curiously.
“What?” I asked, he was staring at me intently. What did I do?

“You are so beautiful.” He softly crooned. “More beautiful than Botticcelli’s Venus.” He came to stand behind me, we both looked into the mirror. damn we really looked good together. But if he felt this way, why the need for other girls? I was tempted to ask, and again I lost my nerve. I turned around and kissed him. Okay, wrong idea!

He broke the kiss. “You need to get going, and I have a meeting in thirty minutes.”
His phone rang, he stepped out of the room to answer and returned fully dressed.

“I have a show tomorrow, can we see the day after?” He asked.

“Ok.” I acquiesced.

He walked me to my car and watched me drive.

I placed a call to Clara to find out where she was. As usual the LED notification light was blinking, I made a mental note to check it when I got to the shop.

I walked in to find Susan and Clara sitting in our chair, staring at me expectantly.

“You girls are so ameboish! Haba! See them sitting waiting for gist.” I teased.

Oya joor. Gist!” Clara urged.

I dropped my bag and joined them on the sofa.

“I couldn’t ask him, kept loosing my nerve.” I said staring straight ahead.

“So what did you guys do all these time, because you don’t ever go out. Abi?” Susan asked.

“We had a massage, and I slept off.”

Clara sniggered. “He gave you, you gave him?”

“Off course not. Professional massage, with a massuese.”

“Oh! In-house off course?”

I sighed by way of response.

“But this Zach tries in some things, my fiance doesn’t remember things like massage and pampering things.” Susan said aloud, kindoff to herself.

“Zach and I have been having unprotected sex.” I announced in the ensuing silence.

“Please say that was a joke?” Susan whispered hoarsely. Turning on me.

“How? Why?” Clara’s voice was louder. Both staring searchingly at me.

I got up and leaned against the wall.
“I thought it meant something, the intimacy. But recently, I don’t know again. And I’m scared.”

We all avoided each other’s gaze, lost in our own thoughts.

“Yes, it does mean something; stupidity.” Clara remarked dryly. “How could you….?”

“No sense crying over spilt milk.” Susan interupted. “Tomorrow we go for a medical test, and you need to sort this thing with Zach quickly.”

“I guess you haven’t checked your twitter notifications, LadyAdeola mentioned you in a tweet.” Clara said.

I got out my phone, and went straight to my twitter notifications, there was Adeola’s mention: I love social media, it gave me my Zach, and a cool new friend in @creativemaryanne!

My Super Ex-Boyfriend! Episode Eight

“You are glowing!” Clara observed two days later. We were at our shop, going through our to-do list for our grand opening, which was scheduled to hold in a week.

I giggled.

“This is serious!” She mused. “You are radiat….. Omg you made up with Zach!” She concluded wide eyed.
“When? Why didn’t you tell us? What was his explanation?” She asked in rapid succession, as excited as I was.

“Chill! One question before another.” I got up from our newly installed lounge chairs, and twirled around. “When? Two days ago, he came here….”

“He did, how….”

“He said he had been seeing my car parked out there for like a week, and he stopped by….. He saw Buchi and I, put two and two together and….”

“Typical male.”

“Anyways, I followed him to his house, determined to have it out with him, and we made up.”

“I’m so happy for you.” She came over and hugged me.

More like, we hugged, we were like two children sharing illicit tales.

“So tell me, what’s his explanation about the pictures?”

My smile faded, I broke eye contact.

“He really didn’t say, you see, those pictures could be promo shots, or even photo shopped. Zach is….”

“MaryAnne!” Clara interrupted me. “You mean he didn’t give any explanations for the pics?” She stared at me disbelieving.
“So how did you guys make up?”

“Clara, Zach is a star, these things are bound to happen!” I crossed my hands across my midriff defensively and moved to the window.

“I’m confused here, Mary. What are you defending: Zach’s career or his infidelity? What were those pictures about?

“Okay Clara. This discussion is closed, I’m done talking.”

“No it isn’t! I’m your friend MaryAnne, if I don’t tell you the truth, who will? Zach hasn’t told you the truth about those pictures and you swallowed whatever story he told you! Worse, he didn’t even explain.” Clara was almost raising her voice.

“Fidelity is a big issue with Zach, he isn’t cheating on me!” I snapped.

“How do you know?”

“Are you suggesting I snoop? You know I don’t do that.” I was getting irritated, and Clara wasn’t showing any signs of letting this go.

“No I’m not. Considering the evidence, don’t you think Zach owes you an explanation?” She stressed.

“I do, but……”

“Don’t allow Zach turn you into one weak female. He should explain how those pics came to be, it’s not rocket science.”

“Why are you taking this extremely personal? Is there something you know which you aren’t telling me?”

“What? How? No, all I’m saying is….”

“This matter is closed. Infact I’m done for the day.” I began packing my bag, picking my notes and other scatterred knickknacks.

Clara sighed and flopped back into the sofa.

At the door, I turned back to her.
“Aren’t you going home?”

She sighed and shook her head at me.

Grabbing her bag she locked up behind me.

* * * * * * * * *

“I can’t believe you girls let a guy come between you.” Susan declared two days later.

We were at Clara’s. For two days after our altercation Clara and I had barely spoken to each other. We hadn’t seen also, until Susan intervened.

“And you’ve also neglected your business! And planning my wedding!” She sounded like a mother chastising her children. “Because of guy issues?”

“Clara was being…..” I tried to explain.

“Really?” She really sounded prim. Like a cross between a mother and a Judge. “I don’t want to know. Can we move on?”

“Yes mommy.” Clara and I chorused and burst into laughter.

“I really am sorry Mary, I was just looking out for you.” Clara apologised.

“I know, and I got too defensive, you did raise some good points.” I replied smiling sadly. “Zach and I will have to talk.”

“Okay, good children! Kiss and makeup.” Susan ordered.

We grinned at her.

“I don’t actually mean kiss! Anyway, grand opening on schedule?” She asked.
“Ask Clara, I’ve been sulking and hiding away.” I replied.

“Yes, on friday. Bring all your colleagues, free flash makeover, and hair bunny for all.” Clara replied.

“Ayi and I have made over a hundred bunnies. We are good to go.”

“Dash me one nau, pre-opening gift. Or mediating gift.” Susan batted her ayes at me.

We concluded our plans, our opening was in a few days.

* * * * * * * * *

Our opening was grand (even if we say so ourselves). Entertainment was on point, people came; male and female, more than I expected. There was something for everyone.
We made some sales, took some orders, went home tired but happy.

And….. I met Ehis. Ehis was dragged to our opening by his sister, who heard about us from her friend.
Imagine the original typical geek and you have Ehis. Dunno if the job affected him or he has always been like that, but he was the typical computer geek.

We met, and I gave him my card. I found myself thinking about him long after our first meeting. He called me the next day and we kindoff hit it off. He was pleasant to talk with.

Zach wasn’t able to be there, he had a prior engagement, but he did give us a shout out on all his social media accounts, and he called me every free moment.

* * * * *

Days after, business kept getting better, I knew I would have to hire another tailor soon to keep up. I had already hired a shopping assistant for the showroom, in addition to the lounge receptionist Clara and I hired.

About a week after, a lady walked into MAP designs while Clara and I were relaxing with gist in her office.

“Ma there’s a lady here to see you.” Funmi, my shop assistant said from the door.

“Who is she? Client or….?”

“She appears to be a client, she said she wants to meet with the lady behind MAP.”

“Okay, send her in.”

We adjusted ourselves as she was ushered in.

Beautiful, sleek, stylish, and she was wearing one of my designs. I liked her already.

“Hello, I’m MaryAnne.” With a warm smile I got up and extended my hand. She took it in a warm handshake.

“Adeola Sawyer.” She said.

“Please sit. This is Clara; my friend and partner.” I introduced.

“Faces by Clara.” Adeola and Clara exchanged niceties.

“I’m glad to finally meet you. Zedeye bought me my first ‘MAP’, and I’ve been a fan since. Bought several online.”

“I’m happy you are a satisfied customer. You say Zach, Zedeye bought your first….”

“Yes, two months ago. I’ve bought six others since then.”

She had this charming demeanour, smiled while she talked and was oblivious to the uneasy curious glances shared between Clara and I.

“So you are Zedeye’s sister?” Clara asked hopefully.

“No, I’m the girlfriend. I was pleasantly suprised to find a Nigerian designer who could get the size thing perfectly. I’m a perfect eight, but wearing eight by a few of the other…..”

I zoned out. She is the what??? There was this loud roaring sound in my head, was it me or was a plane about to crash on us?
She is the what?

Trust Clara, she covered beautifully well. “Oh! You are the girlfriend! MaryAnne we have celebrity in our midst. Come over to the lounge let’s entertain you. Have you seen the showroom?”

Clara ushered her out of the office. I felt sick, hot and cold at the same time.

I remembered that purchase, his sister was a size ten and I did question him about buying a dress a size smaller. He said she requested for an eight.

Oh my!

Clara popped back in. “Mary, I know you aren’t okay, but you have to hold it together. I will try to dismiss her.” She popped back out.

I took a few minutes to calm myself before leaving my office to see what they were up to.
I found them giving her a flash makeover.

“Hello there.” I tried to smile.

“How do I look?” She asked.

“Clara’s not done.” I settled into a chair and watched Clara work her magic.
When she was done, she turned the chair to face me.

“She looks so good.” I commended, she really looked good.

Adeola glanced at her watch. “I’ve got to run.” She got up. “Have my purchases been totalled?”

“Yes ma.” Clara’s sales assistant responded.

She paid and we waved her goodbye. Through the glass walls we watched her walk to a car.

“That’s my car!” I pointed.

“No MaryAnne, your car is parked over there.” Clara pointed out my own car on the other side of the parking lot.

The car Adeola was getting into was a black crosstour, an exact replica of mine!

My Super Ex-Boyfriend! Episode Seven

I saw a picture of Zach and a woman in a passionate embrace. Disbelieving I scrolled up and down the page, there were more pictures; the camera was facing him and there was no denying it was him. While the lady’s features were blurred.

I couldn’t believe it. The caption said the pictures were taken last night. Was that the urgent appointment? To kiss another lady in a club?

“Mary Anne, relax. They must be an explanation for this. It might be; I don’t know, promo shots or something.” Clara tried to calm me.

“Yea, or something.” I replied coldly. I wiped tears which I didn’t know when they fell off my face, and started the car. Without a word I drove back to the shop.
“You sure you are ok?” Clara asked me when we were about to enter our shop.

“I’m fine.” I replied.

“We could do this some other time.”

“I AM FINE!” I screamed at her. I drove us here didn’t I? Why should the world stop because Zach is cheating on me?”

“Mary, you don’t know that for certain.” Clara protested.

“Haba Clara! Give me some credit.” I dropped my bag in a corner. “He said he had a meeting when he left. Meeting, not photo shoot.” I counted of on my fingers. “You saw those pictures, you are a makeup artist; does that look like professionally done makeup for a shoot?”
“There might be an ex….”

“Yes, there is, and it rhymes with teaching. Please, let’s ignore Zach’s iss for now, I need to concentrate on my new showroom. This here will be the lounge,…”


“What is your problem? Why do you want me to dwell on somebody who apparently doesn’t consider me. Zach is somewhere having the time of his life and you expect me to be unhappy because of him?” I shouted.

“No, not unhappy.” I just don’t want you bottling up emotions.” She replied calmly.

I walked away and walked round the showroom.

“What side will you prefer?” I asked her when I returned to where she was, typing furiously on her phone. I bet she was updating Susan.

“I’m left handed.” She replied, watching me warily.

That made me laugh.

“Seriously? You’re watching me like I’m on suicide watch? For a man?”

“You are behaving strangely.” She pointed out.

“Forgive me, this all is new. I don’t know the protocol behaviour when a boyfriend cheats.” I quipped.

“And you discover.” She added. “When a boyfriend cheats and you discover.”

“Whatever!” I picked my bag. “Let’s go for ice-cream. Can Susan come?”

“Lemme ask her.”

“Let’s go abduct her.” I left Clara behind to lock up.

Over ice-cream, we; Clara, Susan and I murdered Zach, and buried him. And I ignored his calls twice, on both phones. That spelt ‘guilty’ to me in block letters. Zach never called twice at once, for him to do that? guilty as charged!

Ice-cream made everything better. We went home to break the news to our elated parents, and a mini-party ensued. My elder brothers even came over when they heard the news.

And so the days passed, Zach didn’t make any more efforts to contact me, and pride kept me from attempting to contact him. Instead I googled him in between working on my showroom.
I refused to talk about it, not to my girls, I refused to even think about it for fear of having to define the state of my relationship with Zach, even to myself.
I did realise one thing though; a mixture of anger and pride is it’s own depressing adrenaline.

I worked twenty-two hours a day, I worked with the craftsmen pimping our place by day, and designed and sewed at night. Did it help? Not so sure.

Two weeks after I got the showroom/Zach’s escapade was made public, the showroom was ready.

The foreman was showing me(Clara had a client) around when Zach walked in.

He angrily looked from my elated face, to the foreman’s animated face and walked away.

“Zach!” I called to him, following.
I caught up with him as he was about to leave.

He stopped.

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

“So this is why you didn’t take my calls?” He retorted hotly.

“I didn’t take your calls because of your infidelity, your very public….”

“And you couldn’t pick up your phone, to hear my side of the story?”

“Pictures say a thousand words.”

“Really? Okay.” And he walked away.
I let him go.

“Is everything okay?” The foreman; Buchi asked from behind me.
Startled out of my reverie, I replied; “Yes. I am good. We’re done here right?” I asked.

“Yes we are.” He replied.

“Aite, I have your check in my purse.” I retrieved the check and handed it to him.

“Thank you very much.”

“You’re welcome, and thank you.”

“You sure you will be okay alone?” He asked from the door as he was about leavong.

“Yes, I will be.” I replied.
Why was everyone asking me that question?

Alone with my thoughts, I made a snappy decision; Zach and I needed to talk. I called him, he answered on the second ring.

“Where are you?” I asked him.

“Driving home.” He replied tersely.

“I’m on my way.” I locked up and drove to his house.

This was my first time of driving to his house, the view looked different with me behind the wheels.

He was helping himself to a bottle of water from the fridge when I walked in. He didn’t acknowledge me, just settled into his favourite couch, his poker face in place. I sat adjacent him.

“Okay, I’m here. Tell me your side of the story.”

“No, you initiated this meeting, so I guess you want to talk.” He replied staring into space.

“I don’t believe this, you accused me of not giving you the benefit of the doubt. I’m here to listen to your side and you don’t want to talk?”

“Talk about what? Is that supposed to be an issue? For goodness sakes am an entertainer, that could have been a fan, or promo shots. Am I supposed to explain myself every step of the way?” He raved.

I couldn’t believe this, this was his take on the whole issue?

“Really? I’m supposed to ignore pictures of you getting frisky with a female in a club?”

“So because you assumed I cheated, you went ahead to cheat?”

“What the heck are you talking about?”

“I have seen your car in that parking lot every day this week. Is that dude my replacement?”

The absurdity of the accusation made me laugh.

“Go ahead, laugh. I’m happy I’m making you happy.”

“Zach, that guy was my foreman. Clara and I are the new owners of that shop. And don’t distract me. This is about you and your infidelity. Who was that woman?”

“You got a shop? And didn’t tell me?”
He sounded so hurt, I felt guilty. This weakened my resolve.

“Yea, it was the day after the car, the day I saw those pictures.” I explained, searching his face for emotion.

“Did you stop to think, how could I go from your parents’ to another woman’s arms? If according to your theory; that was a love embrace?”

That’s a thought!

“So who was she, what was the picture about?”

“I won’t answer that question until you are ready to trust me. So, tell me about the shop.”

I didn’t need to be asked twice. By the time I left for home later in the day, we had made up, without him telling me what those pictures were about.

My Super Ex-Boyfriend Episode Six

Zach came to my house, and it was almost like an inquisition.

The girls and I rushed down to my house to inform my parents Zach was on his way, my father’s only response was an:

He arrived in a two car convoy. Three including mine. He came into our home alone. He postrated for my parents in greeting and graciously accepted our offer of refreshments.

He answered all their questions courteously and with good humour. Not even when my father issued a veiled threat reminding him of my two elder brothers did he waver. However, I did notice something; Zach has this habit of fiddling with something when he is upset, and he was rapidly fiddling with his phone. When my father asked him why he bought me a car, he smoothly replied.

“Maryann is a very good friend of mine, a talented designer. I bought her the car as a gift, in recognition of her creativity and the positive impact she has had in my life.”

“What if she won the award and the car gift.” My mother asked.

“Ma, I ordered for the car the day I heard about her nomination, she was going to get this car whether she won the award or not. Having more than one car isn’t a crime.” He joked.

Aawwww! That’s so sweet!

“What’s the symbolism of the gift?” My father prodded on.

“Sir, it’s a no strings attached gift. All the papers of the car are in her name, it’s totally hers to do with as she deems fit.”

Ok, I think I almost teared up at this point.

Zach’s phone rang and he excused himself.

He returned to apologise, something had come up which he needed to look into urgently.

My father thanked him for the car, and they said their goodbyes.

“That wasn’t so bad was it?” I asked as I walked him to his car.

“No it wasn’t. Babe, I’ve got to run, Lekan will hand over the keys and documents to you.” He said and he got into his car and drove off.
Apparently they expected this quick getaway because the car he drove was turned facing out with the engine running when we came out.

The girls hurried out from eavesdropping at the door I’m sure, and we ooohed and aaahed over the car, we were about to go out for a ride when my mother stopped us.

“What do you think about him?” I asked my parents after Clara and Susan left.

“Your father and I think you should be very careful.” My mother replied.

“You always warn me about all guys.” I replied, uneasy, wondering if they noticed what I did.

“Yes, but this young man….”

My mother interrupted my father. “And he isn’t young; thirty-eight to your twenty-five. In our time, such age differences were acceptable, but today? I wonder why despite the availability of the means he isn’t settled yet.” She said.

Oh my!

“As I was saying,” My father continued. “He is in an industry which promotes false living. You need to be careful.” He warned.

“Yes daddy.”

My mother’s phone rang.
“Ehen, it’s your brother.” She said when she glanced at the screen.

I groaned inwardly, whichever one of my brothers was calling her, both were sure to call me once she tells them the latest news.

I escaped into my room to admire my car from my window. True to my fears both brothers called me on a conference call that evening. When they were done, I acknowledged that Zach had met the easier part of my family.

The next day, Clara and I went to see the office space. We picked Susan at her work place, off course I drove.

The space was everything I had always dreamt off. Prime location, ample parking space, modern amenities, I fell in love. Clara’s description didn’t do justice to the location, for what I saw, their asking price was fair.

We drove to the lawyer’s office where we were asked to wait as the landlady was on her way to join us.

We expected a ‘matronly Hajia’, and were very suprised to see a young woman of about our age!

The lawyer introduced her as Hajia Zainab Shetima.

Susan and the lawyer took over the negotiations to reduce the rent.

“How much can you ladies afford to pay?” Hajia Zainab interrupted them.
Susan replied with an amount considerably lower than the asking price.
She brought it back midway and we all agreed. I couldn’t believe it; I was getting my own showroom!!!!

The lawyers fine-tuned the terms of agreement and we signed on the dotted lines. Clara and I couldn’t contain our joy.
At the car park, about to drive off, Hajia Shetima walked up to my car.

“Hello again ladies.” She greeted us with a smile.

“Hello Hajia.” We chorused, grinning like idiots.

“Where are you ladies headed?”

“Lunch, then it’s back to the office for me, these two children say they’ll go back to their shop.” Susan replied.

“Can I join you?” She asked hopefully.

My first thought was: What?

As usual quick thinking Susan came to our rescue. “Sure.” She said.

“Sure!” We chorused.

We had lunch at a cool new cafe close to ‘my new showroom’. Zainab as she invited us to call her told us her story over lunch. Married at fourteen(her mother fought to delay her marriage that long) to a man old enough to be her grandfather, widowed at nineteen. She was pregnant with her fourth child when her husband died in a plane crash. Her husband was a man of means and in his will he stipulated that any of his wives who remarried lost her inheritance and will only get upkeep for the children whose inheritance would be held in trust till they are of age. Her family needed the money, so she had to stay put.

According to her, we stirred up long buried memories of her childhood. They were four childhood friends, agemates and playmates; she, Hauwa, Rekiya and Aminat. They were all given out in marriage one after the other from the age of twelve. Aminat died in childbirth at the age of fourteen, she was widowed at nineteen, Hauwa’s husband abuses her, and she hadn’t heard from Rekiya in years.

She had no friends, no close family. The high point of her life was school runs and PTA meetings.

Recently, she’d insisted on taking an active part in her inheritance and that was causing major uproar in the family. But she didn’t care, she was taking her life back, she intended to go back to school soon. In her words; being a child widow was worse than being a child bride(or perhaps it’s the same sorry existence).

We parted ways after lunch, dropped Susan off at her office. On our way to the shop, Clara was surfing the web.

“Seriously, what did we do for entertainment before internet and social media? I mused.

“We’ll have to ask our parents, we are the lucky generation, born in the jet age.” She quipped.

“Do you realise our kids will call us ‘old school’?”

“God alone knows what will be current according to them.”

We laughed.

“Omg, Maryann!” She exclaimed.


“Mary…. Park.” She looked at me in a strange way.

“What? What is it?” I braked suddenly. Looking around for the cause of the alarm. I didn’t hit something, did I?

“Park park Maryann, park.” She gestured frantically.

I parked in the next available spot, fearing the worst. She handed her phone to me.

I saw a picture of Zach and a woman in a passionate embrace. Disbelieving I scrolled up and down the page, there were more pictures; the camera was facing him and there was no denying it was him. While the lady’s features were blurred.

I couldn’t believe it. The caption said the pictures were taken last night. Was that the urgent appointment? To kiss another lady in a club?

My Super Ex-Boyfriend Episode Five

My joyful scream brought my mother to the front door immediately.

“Kilode?” She asked as she approached.

“Mommy, my car!” Jumping excitedly, I pointed to the car.

“Good morning ma.” Lekan greeted my mom, bowing in the customary Yoruba form.

“Good morning.” She replied him, her gaze swung back to the car. “Your car?” She questioned.

“Yes mommy, Zach bought me a car.” I was excitedly running to the car when my father’s voice stopped me.

“Who is Zach and why did he buy you a car?” He asked quietly. That kind of quiet voice that sends shivers down your spine.

I turned to face him, the smile wiped off my face. “Daddy, Zach is my friend.” I replied cautiously. Not sure how to answer the second question, I ignored it.

“A friend I am yet to meet is buying you a car?”

I couldn’t reply, my heart was beating wildly.

He turned to Lekan, “Are you Zach?” He asked him.

“No sir.” Lekan replied, prostrating.

“He is Zach’s driver.” I said.

“This Zach fellow bought you a car, and cannot be bothered to deliver it himself.” He nods ominously. “My dear have you met Zach?” He asked my mother.

“Zach is the young man I told you about, the musician from last night.” She replied.

“The one who serenaded you?”

“Yes dear.”

“Interesting. He serenades my wife at night, and buys my daughter a car the next day. This Zach I haven’t met or heard about. I am going to church, when I return, that car shouldn’t be in my driveway.”

Mom and I were frozen to the spot, watching him walk towards his car.

“Mommy?” I turned to her, the unspoken question was; what do I do?”

“Why did he buy you a car?” She asked me.

“I don’t know mommy, here’s the card attached.”

I passed the card with the note to her, after reading the note, she said.

“I’m uncomfortable about the whole thing, ask Zach to come and deliver the car himself, then he can answer any questions we have.”

“You ladies shouldn’t keep me waiting.” My father warned from the car.

“What do I do about the car?” I asked my mom as we locked up the house.

“You heard your father, unless Zach can be here by the time we return from church, the car shouldn’t be here.” She said with a note of finality as she went to join my dad in the car.

“You heard my parents.” I said to Lekan, my heart breaking. “You go back with the car, I’ll call Zach.” As I watched Lekan drive away in ‘my car’, I felt like screaming in frustration.

The drive to church was made in silence. I sent Clara and Susan messages, with the entire gist. We all attended the same church. Clara was also on her way to church, Susan was worshipping at her fiance’s church.

After the ‘ooh’s’ and ‘aaah’s’ over the car, they came to the same conclusion my mom did; Zach should come and deliver the car himself, meet my parents.

When we arrived at church, my parents and I dispersed. Them to adult church, me to youth church. Away from their sight, I veered into the toilet to call Zach.

“Mary Anne.” He answered tersely.

“Babe. How are you?”

“I could be better. Lekan is back.”

“Zach. First of all, thank you so much for the car, I love it. Thank you.”

“It was my pleasure.” He replied wearily. “Although I didn’t anticipate this problem.”

“Zach, my father just wants to see you.” I quickly replied. “Can you come?” I asked hopefully.

“Babe I’m swamped. I have a TV appearance in a couple of hours. After that; a meeting with my producers…..” He sighed.

“If you can spare some time, 30 minutes, max an hour…”

“MaryAnne, my schedule is tight.”

I sighed.

“I have an idea, can I call them on the phone, or skype? Between meetings.”

I was speechless, mouth open speechless. Did Zach just offer to meet with my father on skype?

“Hello? Babes, you still on?” He asked after a few minutes of silence.

“Yes. Yes I’m here.” I cleared my throat. “I don’t think the skype idea would fly, if you can find some time…” I saw my mom approaching. “I’ve got to go, my mom is coming, lemme call you back.” I ended the call.

“Morenikeji.” She called me by my native name. “Your purse was in my bag.” She extended my purse to me.”

I took it. “Thank you ma.” As I was about to enter the youth church, she called me again.


“Ma.” I moved closer to her.

“That young man has to come and see your father, unfailing.”

“Mommy it’s just a car, he hasn’t proposed to marry me.”

“Yes it’s just a car. But you say he is your boyfriend?”

“Yes mommy.”

“Minus the car issue, shouldn’t we meet your boyfriend?”

She had a point.

“The foreign trip was work related that was why I covered for you. However, no more cover ups. He has to come.” She walked away. A few steps on she stopped and turned back to me. “It’s not just about this car, this will tell on your relationship with him.” She walked away.

I have no idea what happened in church that day, Clara sat beside me and served to pull me up when I needed to stand, and nudge me to sit as well.

After lunch in our various houses, we converged at Clara’s parent’s house. She said she had ‘news’ that would take my mind off the car.

“So, today has been so eventful. First; a car gift, now you say you have news. What gives?” Susan asked as she entered Clara’s room.

We had been waiting for her, Clara was almost bursting in suppressed excitement.

“So,” Clara began excitedly. “I have this client, who told me about this empty studio space, in VI. I’ve seen it, it’s in a good location, really big, too big…..”

“Get to the point Clara.” Susan said.
Me, my mind was spinning along as Clara spoke.

“You found studio space? How much?” I asked.

“Very much.” She mentioned an amount that left Susan and I open mouthed, jaw on the floor.

“For how many years?” Susan asked.

“Girls its really big o! On a major road in VI. MaryAnne and I could share.”

“How big is it?” I asked.

“Warehouse size, out facing, with floor to ceiling glass walls. Both of us have display space. Ample display space, with office space, work space. You should see it, you’ll love it.”

“The price though… c’est tres beaucoup.”

“Is the landlord favourably disposed to you guys sharing?” Susan asked.

“The lawyer said the landlord wants to rent the space as one, so if we take it; we have to remain together, if one person leaves, the other does, that kinda thing.” Clara replied.

“I think I’m interested.” I said.

“Really? I hoped you will be. This is the step we need, to really put ourselves out there business wise.” Clara gushed.

“But I don’t have up to half of the asking price.”

“Neither do I. That’s where you come in Susan, I was hoping you could help us negotiate.”

“Is the price open for negotiation?”

“I think so. Why not, let’s all go there tomorrow, see the place, see the lawyer.”

“Yes, I’m so ready!” I squealed.

“Me too!”

Susan rolled her eyes, and muttered. “Girls! So, tell me about the car again!”
I began the gist afresh. Halfway through, my phone beeped. A message from Zach.

I’m on my way to your house, Lekan tells me we are about thirty minutes away.