Hello people, how are y’all? Today begins the first episode of the series; My Super Ex-Boyfriend. Join Mary Anne as she recounts the story or what went down between her and her Super Ex. Read, Enjoy, Share.
NB: This is a work of fiction and has no connection to any person, any similarities are a fiction of the writer’s imagination.
Remember; Read, Enjoy, Comment, Share.

It all began with a tweet. In this era of social media, most relationships begin and thrive on social media platforms.
It was his birthday, as I sketched my designs I enjoyed the music playing on the radio. The dj was playing a special selection of his songs as a tribute to him on his birthday, all my favourites. I sang along as I sketched. I picked up my phone to check what time it was, wow! it was past eleven already. I needed to round off, I had a prospective business meeting in less than two hours. First I attended to the notifications on my blackberry, that lazyfying device. It practically runs your life. Some bc’s, a facebook friend request, and lastly a twitter spam message. About to exit twitter, it crossed my mind to tweet a birthday message at Zedeye; my favourite Nigerian RnB musician. So I did, and to my surprise he retweeted with a thank you and followed back. Wow! I guessed it was a birthday special thing.
I prepared for my meeting with some prospective buyers, which thankfully turned out to be fruitful.
A little background information, my name is Mary Anne Phillips, twenty five years old, youngest child of middle class parents with two older brothers whom I love dearly, but would gladly trade for one elder sister(I hear they are great). I studied and practice fashion designing, I work from a room in my parents home, I have a tailor who works for me, and together we create beautiful, unique ready to wear clothes under my label ‘MAP designs’ which I sell to boutiques for retail.
After dressing, I left instructions for Ayi, my tailor and left for my meeting with a leading online retail store who had approached me to sell my clothes on their website. The meeting was successful.
Fast forward a few weeks later, I uploaded some pictures of my designs on Instagram, and tweeted a link. Zedeye sent me a DM requesting to buy two of the designs, indicating there were for his sister. I couldn’t believe it, I screamed on reading the message. Ayi stopped sewing and looked at me questioning.
“Zedeye wants to buy two of our clothes!” I screamed excitedly.
“Which Zedeye? The musician?” She stood.
“Yes, the musician!”
We both screamed!
A few emails and DM’s later, a money transfer, we mailed the clothes to him. Business successfully transacted.
In the following weeks, all that transpired between Zedeye and I was the occasional like on Instagram, and reply or retweet on Twitter, which my besties and I analysed to death.
Meet my besties; Susan and Clara. We went through primary and secondary school together, and have remained friends ever since. We made a perfect trio, I design clothes, Clara is a professional make-up artist/beauty columnist, and Susan a lawyer. I always select our clothes, Clara does our make-up and Susan serves to keep us sane(and legal). We’ve all lived on the same street in the Surulere suburb of Lagos all our lives.
We had no secrets from each other, we knew all there was to know about each other, our relationships inclusive. So from my first contact with Zedeye, they knew all about it. We tagged him ‘my celeb boyfriend’.

When a few weeks later, Zedeye gave out complimentary tickets to his show, off course I requested. He gave me two, “for my oga at the top and I” as he put it. “No oga at the top, may I have another? For my besties and I.” I requested.
“Sure.” He replied and Direct Mailed another ticket code. ” Why no oga at the top?” He asked.
“Chillin! Flying solo!” I replied. I was fresh out of a relationship.
“Ok, see you at the show.”

In typical girl fashion, we had a shriek fest when I immediately shared the news with them.
So we went for the show, all three of us dressed to the nines, he gave us front row VIP seats! Susan and Clara urged me to go back stage to say hi after the show, but I didn’t want to seem like a groupie.
We uploaded our fun pics of the night and I tagged him.
He sent me a DM. “Why didn’t you come back stage after the show?”
“I guessed you will be busy, didn’t want to intrude.” I replied.
“I was looking forward to meeting you.”
“Really? I didn’t know. Some other time.”
“How about we meet for drinks soon?”
But for the fact that Ayi was already giving me suspicious side glances, I would have screamed in disbelief.
Zedeye wants to meet me for drinks!!!
I mean, I score high points in the looks department, with curves in all the right places, coupled with my high sense of fashion, I’m very attractive, but also very shy and reserved.
So when I read Zedeye’s message, I was flooded with a mixture of excitement and fright.
Drinks with a superstar! But I agreed.
On the agreed upon day, with the help of my friends, I dressed in a simple blue gown(he requested for something blue) which I paired with beautiful yellow flat sandals and a yellow clutch purse, Clara did my make-up, and we were off(yes they came with me)we went in my mom’s car, with Susan driving, I was to meet up with him in a bar in a popular mall on the Island.
Clara and Susan sat in a cafe on the ground floor of the mall, while I went on. On pins and needles.
I spotted him immediately I entered the bar, he was seated alone at a corner table, facing the door. His eyes lit up in a smile as soon as he sighted me, and he ended the call which he was on as I approached.
He stood, and we hugged(the one sided hug).
“It’s so nice to finally meet you. You look even better than all your pictures.” He said as we sat.
“Same with you.” I replied. He looked ultra handsome in a tan blazer over a blue tee shirt and blue jeans. Topped with his signature hat.
He took off his aviator glasses. “So we can connect better.” He joked. We laughed.
I honestly can’t tell what we talked about. All I remember is he told me his real name; Zach Lasisi, and a little about him. Two hours later, a couple of Chapmans, and several ignored calls and messages on both sides(my bb was blinking furiously), we exchanged phone numbers. It was amazing how we planned a first date without talking over the phone, not even once.
He walked me to the car park, said hi to my girls, made sure we drove out safely, before he left with his guys(body guards).
After a second by second recounting of the ‘date’, and going through the rest of the evening with a silly smile, I was about to go to sleep when I got an sms.
“I had a great time with you today, I would like to do it again soon. Zach.”

11 thoughts on “MY SUPER EX-BOYFRIEND!

  1. What archive did u dig out the name ‘Ayi’ from? Lol.
    Typical girls; scream and shriek fest.
    *sigh* I wish I have an older sister too. I too heard they re great *stickin out tongue*

  2. Chinma Eke, Chinma, Olanma Eke, how many times did I call you. This is beautiful. Thank God say I know you now before these write ups becomes a best seller. Thumbs up!!!.

    • Sir! You called me as many times as I answered.
      You know na, express pass always, even when I’m the ‘first lady’.
      Sent from my BlackBerry wireless device from MTN

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