Ms Psyche: It’s your life, live it.

Sorry its coming late.

Hello beautiful people (handsome ones too), it’s another Friday. Yesterday was Chinma Eke’s birthday as I’m sure most of you know, but this year, she is having a birth week i.e. the celebration started on Sunday the 7th of July, and is on till Sunday the 14th. She tagged this year ‘the year of shoes and bags’ i.e. gifts should be either or both, so show her some love by sending your gifts across.
Today, I picked two mails which I will treat alike; I’ll summarize the mails below.
*not real names.
*Richard and *Sara had been dating for years, and now they want to get married. Both families are refusing, because they are from different tribes, and different denominations of the same religion. With threats of disinheritance and denouncements if they proceeded with the wedding, they called the relationship off. They had both been introduced to ‘suitable’ people whom their families wished them to marry, but they couldn’t go through with it. They want to get married, but are wondering if being together is worth being disinherited.
*Bhaira is a 16 year old girl fresh out of secondary school. Her parents (father) wants her to study Law, while she is more inclined to the theatre arts which her parents think is a waste of an education. According to them (him), anybody can act; she doesn’t need an education to do that.
My summation and advice for them both is: IT AINT ANYBODY’S BUSINESS BUT YOURS WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR LIFE. Yes, we are born to our parents for them to guide us, but our parents should realize that it’s our live. For Richard and Sara, I’m happy that they didn’t leave it too late to retrace their steps, a lot of people are in unhappy marriages today because of what their family or society thinks. I think it’s wiser to follow your heart and be happy. Marriage is hard enough to be in it with someone you were compelled to be with, life is too short to be anything but happy.
For my dear Bhaira, I admire your courage. A lot of young people in this generation are as fickle as a leaf tossed about in the wind. It’s a good thing you know what you want to do and you want to do it professionally. If you go through the profile of our screen stars, you will see that the majority of the successful ones have had some form of training. So long as it’s what you truly have a passion for, I suggest you go for it. Talk with your parents, and respectfully explain to them why you would rather train as an artist.
I really don’t get people who try to plan another’s life. If you choose a spouse for your child will you live with them all through? If you decide your child’s career, will you work for him or her? If you have raised your child/ children well I think with your guidance, you should let them make life’s decisions.
Disclaimer: This is not a call for children to be disobedient, but for parents to trust their children to make good decisions and not enforce their will on their children. At any time you disagree with you child or parents choices; dialogue. Talk about it, and either reach an understanding or a compromise.
Next week, I have *Emily in a good old guy bashing round. Hang out with us with your refreshments, because it’s a no holds barred guy bashing.
Ms Psyche.

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